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  It was a mare, not a stallion, but it was also a deep brown—the same color as the stallion that had trampled her so many years ago. Olivia considered backing out. Maybe she could leave this horse for Ethan when he came back.

  She thought of how tired Ethan had been lately and how she’d promised him she would help him. Olivia couldn’t do that to him now. She also knew the horse was hungry and she wasn’t sure when Ethan would be back.

  She scraped all her courage together and opened the stall door. Bit by bit she shimmied along the wall toward the food trough.

  The first horse had stayed back from her, pulling back its ears. This one—excited by the prospect of food and no doubt tired of waiting—moved toward Olivia, fast.

  Terror grabbed at her throat and she couldn’t move. The horse came closer and closer, towering over her like a giant. Olivia couldn’t help herself. She screamed.

  The sound startled the horse and it reared up, paws clawing the air. Olivia cowered, unable to move. It was happening all over again, wasn’t it?

  “It’s okay,” someone shouted, and she stopped screaming. “Olivia, it’s okay. She won’t hurt you.”

  Olivia looked up at the horse again. It had stopped rearing. It stood in the stall quite still, looking toward the stall door where Ethan stood.

  “It’s okay, girl,” Ethan said in a low voice, coming into the stall. When he reached Olivia, she flung herself into his arms.

  “I’m so sorry,” she said and she started crying. “I’m so sorry.”

  Ethan shook his head and stroked her back. “Don’t be,” he said. “It’s all right.”

  He let go of Olivia and picked up the bucket, dumping the oats in the trough before he led Olivia out of the stall and closed the horse in. He pulled her against him and Olivia shuddered. The fear was still like a knot in her stomach but Ethan was there now. With his arms wrapped around her, she felt safe. This was the second time something had gone wrong and Ethan had been there to save her.

  Olivia had a good man, and this was how she repaid him. It was pathetic.

  “Come, let’s go inside,” Ethan said. “And you can tell me what’s going on.”

  Olivia swallowed. She’d wanted to keep her fear from Ethan but she knew it was impossible now.

  When they sat down to supper together, Ethan picked up his fork. Before he started eating he asked, “Tell me…why are you so scared of horses?

  “The mare charged me,” Olivia said.

  Ethan shook his head. “I was there the whole time, sweetheart. It didn’t charge you. I saw what happened.”

  Olivia felt her cheeks color. She was embarrassed, upset.

  “There’s nothing wrong with being afraid, you know,” Ethan said. When she looked up at him, his face was full of compassion. He meant it.

  “Tell me what happened. I know you’re frightened of horses for a reason.”

  Olivia breathed out with a shudder. Ethan was being so kind. She couldn’t help but share with him. So, she did. She told him what had happened when she was a child and how it had impacted her life.

  “I know it’s silly,” she said. “I really tried.”

  Ethan shook his head. “It’s not silly at all. We all fear something. I just want you to talk to me. I want to be there for you, to keep you safe.”

  Olivia nodded and looked at Ethan. He really was a good man. With him, she felt the safest she’d ever felt.

  Four

  Ethan

  The rest of the week was rough. By Friday, Ethan was as exhausted as all his men. They had been working late every day to make Mr. Fox’s quota.

  Ethan felt guilty. He was torn between his men and his obligation to be there for his wife. If he let his men off easy he could lose his job and not be able to take care of Olivia. If he pushed them so he could keep his job, he would see her less and the men would burn out.

  He had no idea how to handle it. The only thing he could do was damage control, push the miners hard enough that Fox didn’t grumble too much and spend time with Olivia when he could.

  He woke up on Friday feeling groggy. His head ached dully between his temples and his muscles were sore. He’d overslept, waking up after the sun was already in the sky.

  To make matters worse, he couldn’t find his payroll book.

  “I usually put it with my coat,” he said to Olivia. He was starting to panic about how late it was. “I don’t know what I did with it last night.” It was important that he find it. The book had the weekly wages calculated for each of his men and it was more money than usual because they’d put in more hours. He could have calculated it if it had been a normal week, but it hadn’t been normal for a while.

  He ran around the house, searching frantically. The later it became, the more he worried and it made it harder to think. Finally, Olivia stopped him.

  She put her hand on his cheek and he calmed almost immediately. She had that effect on him.

  “It’s going to be okay, darling,” she said. “I’ll look for the book and bring it to you when I find it.”

  Ethan nodded, trying to relax. He felt so much pressure with work and he knew that it was affecting his relationship with Olivia. Yet she never got angry with him.

  “You’re a godsend,” he said and he meant it. She kissed him and sent him on his way.

  Outside, Ethan saddled his horse and set off toward the mine. He was lucky to have a woman like Olivia. She had done everything in her power to help him with the new hours he was working, taking on more chores—even ones she feared. When he got stuck, like today, she was there for him. They hadn’t been married for very long but Ethan knew he had a good woman.

  He was the luckiest man alive.

  As he rode, his thoughts turned to work. They had broken a lot of ground. They had extended the tunnels, almost doubling the underground network. In doing so they had almost doubled their coal, too.

  Fox wasn’t ecstatic, having hoped for even more, but he wasn’t too unhappy either.

  Ethan was concerned about the tunnels they’d been working on. With the speed they worked to get things done, he was worried the way the tunnels were supported with beams wasn’t enough. What if the tunnels collapsed on them? So far, nothing had gone wrong. Ethan had personally inspected every tunnel—he always did. Every life that walked those tunnels was his responsibility.

  He couldn’t help but worry, though. He preferred being cautious, living by the motto “better safe than sorry.” But what Fox had said about his job, about being able to get in someone who would work harder than he could, haunted him day and night and it took a lot of control not to push the men harder than they could handle for fear of his own future.

  Finally, he neared the mines. His men were gathered around the entrance, ready to get to work. When he arrived, they looked up.

  “I’m sorry I’m late,” he said. “We can get to work. I won’t push you later tonight because of my own mistakes.”

  They were happy with his decision and got to work without any complaints. Being a just foreman helped him. He cared about his men, he was fair to them, and in return he earned their loyalty. They were willing to forgive his mistakes.

  One of the miners, Will, walked to him.

  “The men are talking,” he said to Ethan. He was one of the hardest working men Ethan knew. Will took charge often and if anyone could be the next foreman, it would be Will. Whether Fox would ever see that and do something about it was a different story.

  “What are they saying?” Ethan asked.

  “They’re tired. They want a break. I watch them while they’re in there and they’re starting to make careless mistakes. In work like this, careless could turn into dangerous before you know it.”

  Ethan nodded. “Thank you,” he said.

  Will turned, not waiting for an answer. He knew and trusted Ethan enough to know that Ethan would make the right decision.

  Ethan watched Will walk away, joining his friends as they went into the mines. He was worried for their saf
ety, worried for his own job, worried about everything. He didn’t know how he was going to handle it.

  If he could manage to get a restaurant of his own, if he could finally make that career change, everything would be different. Ethan had decided a long time ago that he would make Will the new foreman if it were up to him. He couldn’t imagine leaving his men in more capable hands than his.

  Then, when he was away from Mr. Fox and his constant pressure for more money, he could finally breathe, too. He would create a new life for himself and Olivia. He would spend more time with her—she deserved it—and they would both be happy.

  It was just a matter of time. As soon as he had the money together and he could ensure that Fox wouldn’t push a stranger with no regard for his men into his position, he would leave. He would make a better life, a safer one. One that wasn’t tainted black at the edges.

  Yes, Ethan had dreams that he was determined to realize, even more so now that he had Olivia.

  If for no one else, it would be for her. She deserved a life where she wouldn’t be haunted by her fears because she had to make up for what Ethan couldn’t do at home.

  Seeing her cowering like that when there was nothing out to get her had damn near broken his heart. She deserved more than that. He was proud of her for trying to face her fear for him. It was a declaration of love if there was any, but he felt guilty that it had gone so far. He should have been there for her when she needed him, should have been able to do his own chores.

  That, if nothing else, was enough reason for Ethan to know that he had to make a change if he didn’t want his life to remain the same.

  Five

  Olivai

  Olivia searched the whole morning, and finally found the payroll book Ethan had been looking for. It had fallen on the floor beside their bed and he had unknowingly kicked it under the bed. He must have taken the book to bed with him.

  It was a testimony to how overworked he was. Olivia had learned that Ethan was a creature of habit. He had routines that he followed, habits that never changed. That something was out of place and that he’d overslept that morning told her everything she needed to know about how things were going with her husband’s job.

  Once she had found the book, Olivia prepared the food for supper so that she could finish the meal when she got back.

  When she was ready to leave, she closed the door behind her, then stopped and looked toward the barn. She would have to cover the journey on foot.

  Olivia thought about the night Ethan had found her cowering in the stall. Her cheeks burned with humiliation, even if Ethan said he didn’t think it was wrong. She couldn’t live her life like this.

  She paused, then with renewed determination, she set out toward the barn. Ethan had said that the mare would never have hurt her. She knew—when she didn’t think with her fear—that the mare was a timid horse. She could ride her to the mines. If she could just get herself on the horse’s back, it wouldn’t be able to trample her and she would be able to ride to Ethan.

  In the barn, she found the saddle and bridle and walked toward the mare’s stable. The horse pricked its ears at her when she came closer.

  “It’s just me,” Olivia said. She felt ridiculous talking to the animal but the animal responded, moving its ears back and forth.

  Olivia put her hand on the stall door and took a deep breath. She pushed the door open and stepped in. The horse didn’t rush toward her like before, didn’t attack her as Olivia had thought it might.

  In fact, the mare just stood there. Maybe Olivia could do this.

  She stretched out her hand toward the horse and put one small foot in front of the other, creeping closer. The horse didn’t move. The closer Olivia came, the harder it was to breathe. The stall walls closed in on her. Olivia swallowed hard, trying to push through. The horse shifted its weight and Olivia cried out and jumped back.

  Oh! She felt so stupid! It was nothing.

  But her courage—the little bit she had—had disappeared and she couldn’t get closer to the horse again.

  There was no way she was going to be able to ride the horse to Ethan.

  Olivia left the stall again, closing the door behind her. She put the saddle and bridle back where she found it and walked out of the barn feeling like a defeated woman. She would have to set out on foot. It didn’t bother her—Olivia had walked many miles in her life because of her fear of horses.

  It was a beautiful day. The sun was warm, the earth hard beneath her feet, and her surroundings were painted with the rich green that only mother nature can provide. Olivia had the time to take in the countryside and to realize how much more beautiful it was than what she had seen traveling to Carson Valley on the stagecoach. It really was lovely.

  By the time the sun was high in the sky Olivia was getting tired. Her face was wet with sweat, her hair clinging to her face, and her neck and her feet were starting to hurt. The mines were much further away than she’d thought.

  All of this was because she wouldn’t ride a horse. Stupid woman, she scolded herself.

  The sun moved across the sky as time passed with every step and by the times she finally spotted the mines with the men milling around in front of it, it was so late they were ready to go home.

  Without the payroll book, none of the men could be paid yet. Olivia felt the familiar tug of humiliation in the pit of her stomach. Her thighs screamed at her, her muscles aching. Her feet had rubbed blisters and walking on them had gone from uncomfortable to painful. She didn’t want to think how she would get back home after she had taken almost a day to get to the mines.

  Finally, she was close enough to pick Ethan from the crowd of men. He spotted her and walked toward her, looking relieved.

  “I was scared you didn’t find it,” he said when she handed him the book.

  Olivia shook her head. “It was under the bed of all places.”

  Ethan took the book from her and kissed her cheek. Then he hurried back to the men.

  Olivia hung back, watching Ethan talk to the men. She wasn’t close enough to hear what he was saying to them or what they said in return, but they didn’t look happy.

  She couldn’t blame them, either. It was because of her they had to stay at the mind so long, waiting for pay they couldn’t get without the payroll book. The men were tired. If Ethan’s exhaustion was any indication, they’d all had a terrible week and staying this late because of her had been very unwelcome.

  What she also saw was that the men respected Ethan. Not once did they fight with him about it, raise their voices, or make life difficult for him. They accepted their money and left in groups of twos or threes. She watched them leave until only Ethan was left behind.

  Only then did she walk to him.

  “I’m sorry,” she said. She expected Ethan to be angry.

  He frowned. “Sorry for what?”

  “That it took so long to get here. I wanted to ride here but I just couldn’t. So I walked, and as you can see, it took forever.”

  “It’s all right, sweetheart,” he said. “I’m just glad you got here in time. The men would not have been happy to leave without their pay.”

  Olivia studied his face but he didn’t seem angry. He just looked tired. Exhausted.

  Olivia didn’t know what else to say. She felt embarrassed and ashamed that she had caused all of this.

  “Shall we go home?” she asked.

  Ethan shook his head. “I still need to go into the tunnels, inspect the work the men did today. Wait for me, I won’t be long.”

  This was why Ethan was the foreman, she realized. He was willing to stay late and work harder than all the men, even when it was her fault it had gone on this late.

  When he was finally finished, he took Olivia’s hand and led her to his horse. Her heart beat faster and she swallowed hard. She’d known she’d have to ride back with him, of course. There was no way he’d leave her to walk home alone.

  “I won’t let anything happen to you,” he said. He held th
e horse and helped her on. The moment she was in the saddle, she relaxed. This was one step closer, at least. As long as she didn’t have to handle the horse she could be on it. Ethan mounted the horse behind her and held her tightly as he kicked the steed into motion and they headed home.

  Olivia was ever grateful for a wonderful husband. No matter what she did, he never lost his temper or his patience.

  What had she done to deserve such a husband?

  Six

  Ethan

  After another week, the men had about had it. Ethan could see it in the way they arrived at work in the morning, the way they went home in the evening. They were tired, dragging their feet, going through the motions now when they’d been happy to come to work before.

  Ethan was tired, too. When he was overworked he struggled to sleep. It was ironic but the more exhausted he became the more he lay awake at night. The combination left him feeling restless, disoriented, uncomfortable. It felt like the tunnels in the mines dominated his life, that he was forever wandering around in the dark.

  Exhaustion did that to him and he understood that he had to do something about it. When he started to see it happen to his men—the same dark circles under their eyes, the same despondent look on their faces—he knew he had to do something about it.

  Ethan always took care of others around him much better than he took care of himself.

  “What are you going to do?” Olivia asked. He’d told her about how hard the men were working and how difficult it was becoming for them.

  “I think I have to give them some time off. They’ve earned it and they need it.”

  He pulled off his shoes, unlacing them one by one. His back ached and his legs felt like lead.

  “What about Mr. Fox?” Olivia asked. She knew by now how he was driven by money, how what was happening was because of the mine owner expecting more and more than they could realistically—and safely—produce.